I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize
