oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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