that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
