Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
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