i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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