I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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