Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
