I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
