My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize