if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize