I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
im six kinds of drunk right now
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Randomize
