I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
