About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
can u get pink eye on your cock?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Randomize
