the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
