You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
