oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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