erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize