so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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