Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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