Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize