You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
