It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
where am i from again
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
