Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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