I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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