I must be too annoying 4 u.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize