i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
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