Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
