i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
MIDGETS
????
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I have already put on my inside pants.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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