We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
