low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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