We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
