She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
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