After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
