As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm just crazy horny about you
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
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