can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
