You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
