How'd it feel making her break her religion?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
