I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I love you. Go after that dick
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
