if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
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