"it" just moved
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
She needs sedatives and a leash
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize