that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
