the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
They have beer where we have blood.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
