Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Randomize
