What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
