STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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