DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
