My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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