but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
so much tequila, so little girl.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Randomize
