whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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