Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
