Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Randomize
