Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize
