yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
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