I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
